Questions answered: Dealing with a dominating personality
“Dear Min –Tonight I shared a presentation on your process and a question came up about a team with a dominating personality. How might I encourage the rest of the group and keep the dominator from scaring off the others?” Thanks, Alice
Alice: The key is setting the “ground rules” at the very beginning. If the participants understand the rules, they will actually help you navigate through the process. The group’s success depends on their skills of divergence, convergence, deferring judgment, avoiding killer phrases and following the process. Introducing the ground rules (especially if you do it in a fun way) will help set a good tone and allow the group to collectively manage members who are stepping out of line. Typically, no one wants to be seen as a bad actor once the rules about bad acting are established.
Tools like the thought catchers, posters and tent cards are very helpful in keeping the group dynamics fun. Remind enthusiastic participants to “hold that thought…use your thought catcher,” if they are eager to leap into the conversation ahead of – or more loudly than – less exuberant team members.
Try having the participants complete the Online CPSP (the Profile) before the workshop. Engaging the team in discussing their different problem solving styles can work wonders in making the process flow smoothly.
This week’s Minsight:
Every session we facilitate may not be perfect at the beginning; they rarely are. But they will be increasingly valuable as long as we follow the process and use the skills the best we can. Next time you facilitate, choose the ground rules that will best work for you. Feel like chiming in? What ground rules have you used?
Hi Min – this is Nicole from Jamaica- sat in on your training here recently…I agree with this approach. There is always one in the group who tends to dominate the group. Its good to set the ground rules but also monitor and redirect them as necessary to these guidelines. Adults can be pushy but will generally follow the guideline if prompted to openly.
Building on Min’s response, I find the fact finding exercise is a great tool to “normalize” the voices in the room. Focusing the conversation on facts helps “defuse” some of the arguments that a “dominator” might have, driven by elements like hierarchy/level or personal biases that might not be fact based.
One simple technique I use is to craft an exercise that requires individual thinking. For example, “Individually, write down five to ten ideas that address the task. We’ll take a quiet five minutes for this and then I will get three from each person by going around the room starting on my right.” This way, everyone gets to share their thoughts while giving time for quiet preparation. A key point: never start with the dominator. Have him/her speak in the middle of the sharing so the example of other, concise speakers will be fresh and he/she will be aware of the others waiting to speak.